Ahh man, I am on the top of the World, as Ana told me today..

Remember I told you perception is all that matters? I must admit, its easier to perceive positively when everything just goes right. As Paulo Coleho put it in "The Alchemist", the nicest thing about being in the absolute deepest shit is that you are sure you can only get better from here. Ok maybe good old fella used some other words but you get the point.

I has some family shit going on (shit stands for bad things, it is not the case that I use it because I cant recall a more proper noun).. it seems to get back on track. School was a little messy lately, not that its hard I was just a little confused what the hell am I doing here, wasting time, paying a lot of tuition fee and so on.. I think I can see the end of the tunnel there. Last but very much not least I had those love issues. Let me go into detail a little bit there.
Since my last post, something has changed. A friend of mine had really well spot my problem. I did not know how to exist alone. I mean you do all the work, and school stuff you must do, spend time with your family, friends and so on, do some sports, and finally top of the cream, your girl. There is time separated in my schedule to make someone feel special, to offer my love and kindest caring, to love and to be loved. When my relationship was over, I went through the schedule, and there I was with time and energy left, but with noone to give it to. That made me lonely. I suffered alone, than I started looking for someone to fill in the space. Not only that of course, I spent all that time and energy to find my next partner, my next soulmate. I was LOOKING, and SEARCHING... I was ready to grab the opportunity even if it would not have been perfect. Luckily Zs had saved me from a lot of bad days. She was more than worthy of any effort I put into this matter, on the other hand she has never been really mine. It would be cruel to say I only fell in love with her because she was there at the right time, I sencerely believe this is not so, but the fact she was there, saved me from missing the target badly. Back to the point, I went through a huge change. All that happened is I realized, there is life alone. Dont hate me when I say (time to advertise) I am young, healthy, I guess I have some kind of (weird and hardly explainable) charm (for the lovers of the kind), the world lies in front of me, I can do what I want, nothing is impossible, I just need to dare to dream. I have a loving family with just about too females in it, but I should be happy. No matter what happenes, I am one of the luckyest sons of bitches. I am great alone, if there is someone who wishes to join me on this trip to heaven on earth, she is more than welcome to, I have a lot to offer, but until than, I have my own, independent path to walk.

"Here is the fun fact" (Eurotrip), from the very second I accepted this, I have girls around. Believe or not,- not that I care- but from the moment I stopped looking like a miserable need-anyone-now kind of person, there are ladies who appreciate me. I can even remember the second when I stepped over my past, and made peace with it. My heart and soul got free, my face put the news on the show for anyone to see, now I nothing can stop me. No-fucking-thing.

I feel wonderful. I really do.